Early Christmas Decorations and Other Suggestions

This is the time of year when Americans start hearing complaints about how “it’s not even Thanksgiving yet, why are stores already playing Christmas music?!” Not that I don’t agree with the sentiment, but I think if we’re going to call out one phenomenon, we should call out a bunch of others that are similar in principle. So I propose the following:

When previewing “Next week’s episode”, television networks should no longer add “And then in two weeks and preview two episodes ahead. What if this contains spoilers for next week?

If you set your Facebook profile picture to your Halloween costume, and you still have that as your picture after New Years, your account will be deleted.

No more summer trailers for movies that don’t come out until next summer.

No more summer previews for television shows that don’t start until the spring.

No more pilot episodes for a show that won’t begin airing regularly until a month after the pilot.

No more political party debates, media coverage of primaries, or polls about primary candidates until January 1 of the election year.

No more servers bringing you the check before asking whether you want dessert. (Seriously, what’s up with that?)

The most important message here is that we need to stop jumping the gun and living in the distant future (or past). The second most important message is that Sam watches a lot of television.

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